The End

As the light leaves my eyes
The darkness descending
A smile touches my lips
For soon it’ll be over
My pain will be gone
In the nothingness of death

Too many years spent alone
A heart broken and scarred  
Leaving behind only bitterness and sorrow
That as the end nears
Only relief do I feel
In these last moments

Their names I remember
Though I’m long forgotten
A love never returned
A life of a lonely man
Lost in the shadows
Where no one dare look

Who will wonder in?
On this bloody scene
Of someone long forgotten
A soul lost long ago
That in the end
Only death brings relief

Will anyone care that I’m gone?
Will even a single tear be shed?
Or will I be unloved even in death?
But care I not!
Hope long gone
As I reach this my end

Creature of Beauty

Emily sits in her rocking chair
Looking out upon the world
Watching the beauty of a setting sun
That fills her soul with joy
Letting her mind wander to days past
When she was a younger woman than today

Rocking back and forth
Sleep overtakes her and she starts to dream
Dreams formed from memories past
When she and the world were younger
Standing outside in the early morning air
Full of the sweet smell and sound of summer

She lets this dreamscape fill her senses
Her eyes taking in her surroundings
Until her eyes rest upon a herd of horses
Her heart skipping a beat at the memory
Of one horse so special and magical
Eyes searching him out
A creature of beauty

There he stands apart from herd
A guardian watching over them
One mighty stallion full of grace and power
Of elegance and beauty
Seeing this horse again she’s filled with love and desire
A desire to feel that power underneath her
As she rides this beautiful creature

In the land of her dreams
She runs to this mighty stallion
Her hands reaching out to his coat
His skin like warm silk as it slides over muscle
Letting herself be consumed by smell and the touch of this beautiful animal
That always tells her she’s home
This is where she belongs

In this world of dreams where she is young again
She mounts this graceful and magical beast
Feeling again the power beneath her
Like a dangerous bomb waiting to explode
That thrills and excites her
Knowing she is one with the horse
She’s his friend and master

Riding this horse she feels as one
With the whole of nature
Seeing the world as intended
This creature of beauty allowing her to see and feel
The wonder of creation
In all its heavenly beauty

Then the dream is over and Emily awakens
With tears of joy and sadness in her eyes
Joy at the wonderful memories
But sadness she’ll never again see
Such a creature of beauty
In this the last of her days

A Shining Light

There are times I forget

To say the simple things

So you know the feelings

Inside my heart

For you my best friend

My one shining light

Your friendship is a treasure

More precious than diamonds and gold

Touching my soul in ways untold

Warming a heart once so cold

Your warmth and kindness

A shining light in the darkness

You are my comfort and strength

As I swim each length

In this my journey of life

Fighting with all my might

Knowing you’ll always be there

To answer my prayer

You know me so well

Secrets I thought I’d never tell

My soul I’ve shown to you

Your trust I value

Your beautiful blue eyes

So kind and wise

I hope this friendship lasts

Always full of laughs

That we’ll always be there

Even in times of despair

To give a friendly hug

Showing the warmth of our love

My Dearest Friend

I’ll love you always
Though we may not be lovers
Our hearts not meeting in that way
Your friendship no less special
Filling my heart with warmth
A soul inspired

You have touched my life
With your kindness and sensitivity
Your heart so full of love
A friendship so easily given
To the truest of souls

I share my life with you
A person so understanding
Filled with joy and laughter
But also sadness and pain
That comes from knowing a broken heart
And dreams left unfulfilled

Hopefully, many years from now
We’ll still be friends
Sharing in our life stories
Over a cup of coffee
Our hearts full of warmth
For the bond we share

This Body of Mine

There are times I feel trapped

Trapped by this body of mine

That doesn’t work as it should

A brain damaged

By a premature birth

Weeks spent in a glass cage

Without even the warmth

The warmth of my mother

There are days I long to be free

To fly away from my life

Longing to know the feeling

That only freedom brings

These chains wrapped around me

That bound me to the earth

Every movement is an effort

A challenge to be faced

Finding an inner strength

Just to make it through the day

And does anyone really understand?

The effort it takes to stand

Life is a struggle

A fight until the end

Not letting my body win

But I’m no boxer in the ring

I can’t do this on my own

I don’t want to be alone

I need reasons to keep fighting

Keeping the wheelchair at bay

Not wanting the easy path

But there are times

I feel like giving in

Letting my disability win

Stop Loving You

I wish I could stop loving you

Turn these feelings off
No more tears to cry
Trying to live a lie
With this my painted smile
Facing my toughest trial
 
I wish this was as easy
As you seem to think it should be
Unaware of the spell you cast
On this my fragile heart
Lost in the blueness of your eyes
Unable to see truth or lies
 
I’m lost in the sorrow
Of what will never be
Wishing I could forget
The truth and beauty of you
But you shine so brightly
As I dream of you nightly
 
I wish I could stop loving you
As I pick my heart up off the floor
Knowing it’s time to move on
Trying somehow to forget
While knowing this to be true
I’ll always love you
 
Will I find someone like you?
Touching me so deeply
Forever changing the man I am
With a heart so full of kindness
That these tears of sorrow
Won’t be gone tomorrow

She’s Going Home

She’s going home tonight
To the family she left behind
She can’t forgive try as she might
All those years spent alone
Sheltered from the world
In an empty home

She stands on the platform
Suitcase in hand
Her heart torn
By the memories past
Her mind full of doubt
She feels the outcast

She boards the train
Knowing she can’t turn back
Only regret would remain
A peace she must make
With her father soon to die
Though she’s full of heartache

She sits alone lost in thought
As the world rushes by
Thinking of the love she sought
When she was just a little girl
Wanting her daddy’s love
To be his precious pearl

As she nears her destination
Her heart full of fear and doubt
She feels like an orphan
Though home’s close at hand
With a feeling of deja vu
Looking on this familiar land

Standing at the door
Her heart is racing
Never has she felt so unsure
Of the roads she has taken
Hoping she’ll find the words
To explain her reason

Looking into her father’s eyes
Seeing the pain he tries to hide
The tears run as she cries
At last finding peace
In his tender embrace
Her pain finding a release

She stands at his grave side
Her heart full of sorrow
Thinking of the years denied
Of the wounds mended
Before he breathed his last
A journey home not ended

A poem written in 2009.

Blanket of Snow

When I’m with you
I feel so complete
There is nothing more I want or need
Than to be here with you
The girl in my heart
The girl of my dreams

We’re walking in the snow
That makes the world
Seem so beautiful and pure
In it’s blanket of white
Under the moonlight
On this cold and clear night

You look so wonderful and cute
Wrapped up against the cold
The snow so inviting and soft
That we lie down together
Not feeling its icy embrace
As I admire the beauty of your face

My heart feels so content
As I look into the night sky
Admiring the beauty of the stars
With you in my arms
On our blanket of snow
Letting our love show


A poem written last year inspired by a photo of someone lying in the snow.